UK Attitudes to Relationships 2010-10-21Posted by clype in Articles of Interest, Money.
Tags: compatibility, dating, men, romance, telationships, women
It’s a question that has kept men on their toes for millennia, but what women want from men in 2010 may bear only a passing resemblance to what they wanted 30 years ago.
The company behind dating site match.com has just released ‘The Lovegeist Report’, a study tracking changing attitudes towards love and relationships in the UK.
It’s a document that covers all aspects of dating and relationships — but, if you boil it down, a few patterns start to emerge.
For example,according to ‘The Lovegeist Report’, 38 per cent of modern women would choose a slender man, but nearly the same number — 34 per cent — would be happy with a man carrying a few extra kilos.
‘The Lovegeist Report’ confirms that love and relationships are at the mercy of economic conditions like everything else. Economic woes have led women to focus more on emotional security and less on grand romantic gestures.
In the study, just 14 per cent of daters aged between 25 and 40 see a high income as a deciding factor in picking a potential partner, whereas 96 per cent believe that feeling emotionally secure is important.
‘Today’s women have realised that true commitment is something that money and a wedding-ring can’t always buy,’ says Ms.Kate Taylor, relationship expert at match.com.
‘Diamonds may be a girl’s best friend, but they may not be her best choice for a life partner!’
‘Gone are the days of bling — instead, a girl would rather you noticed her particular tastes and catered to those instead.’
It’s the same if you’re just at the dating stage, says Ms.Taylor. Forget expensive restaurants; she’s more likely to fall head-over-heels for walks in the park, picnics and home-cooked meals. She wants simple pleasures, and a bit of thought before a lot of expense.
If thoughtfulness is in, so is real companionship. In difficult times, we all want someone on our team. It may be a cliché, but we want someone we can depend on.
‘[In times of anxiety], we know that people will perhaps start to value the things that are not so materially obvious… There’s nothing more empowering than knowing someone’s watching your back,’ says psychologist Ms. Cecilia d’Felice.
According to Kate Taylor,
‘what they’re looking for is real-world romance — a partner they can count on day-to-day, not one who drops in like the Milk Tray Man then scarpers.
‘It seems that what women are looking for in 2010 is a good old-fashioned bloke — reliable, dependable, and safe. So keep your word and you’ll keep your woman.’
And because your finances matter less to her, and your friendship matters more, she isn’t likely to be impressed by your long hours in the office. In 2010, she wants you to be more committed to her than you are to your career.
‘The majority say they want a partner who’ll be there for them at home, not at the end of an office extension number,’ says Ms.Taylor.
All of which is pretty good news. The woman of 2010 wants emotional security, stability and a comrade in arms. She wants a real future, not a fairytale one. She wants a romantic, not a show off.
In other words, she wants exactly the sort of stuff most of us can offer.
- CLIPPED FROM: “What do women want from men in 2010?” MSN Him, 20101021